And Now It's Pouring...

Going Through Money Like Water part IV..

The old idiom; "It never rains that it pours" seemed to be fulfilling itself. First it was the purchase of the new Sony Bravia HDTV, followed by the order for cabinets for the construction of our media center, then our septic system's lift pump burns out. Certainly this had to be the end of the spending spree...or was it ?

For weeks I had been getting up achy and sore, my neck creaked and snapped, my spine ached and my shoulders felt stiff. At night I noticed that when I turned over, one of the springs in the mattress would make a sound, a definite "sproing". I felt it whenever it snapped and knew that something wasn't quite right. With definite reservation I discussed this with John and we both knew the answer was "a new mattress". On the surface the innerspring mattress looked okay however it was 22 years old and it's springs were obviously losing their spring !

Since we had already sustained a small hemorrhage of cash the last thing we needed was yet one more big ticket purchase. It seemed certain that this would have to wait and we'd make due with the old mattress for awhile longer. John had other ideas, perhaps he was tired of my overly grumpy mornings or perhaps he felt sorry for my discomfort, whatever compelled him we ended up scouting out all the local mattress stores and comparing mattresses and prices. In 22 years the price of mattresses has increased as well as their thickness. Some of the new beds are now so thick one needs a set of steps just to get into bed. How does one make up a bed that is so tall ? Also crossing my mind was bedding. We had several sets of sheets but none that would fit an 18" or 20" mattress.

In the end we arrived at a local mattress firm and discussed our situation with one of their knowledgeable sales associates. Funny thing about knowledge, the more information you acquire the more confused you become. At the back of my mind I knew I would really love to have an adjustable bed as I have a problem with a condition called Acid Reflux. Our old bed had a couple of risers under its feet to elevate the head of the bed; these risers are a royal pain, always slipping out, especially whenever I tried to move the bed. Amazing how the act of my moving the bed causes the risers to slip out of place, could it be that the two are connected somehow? The idea of no longer having these annoying risers seemed most enticing.

 

To make a long story just a tad shorter, let me say that we settled upon a well known brand name, coil-spring mattress along with a simple, very standard, adjustable bed base. On the day of delivery, the mattress warehouse had trouble locating a standard adjustable base, so while they continue to search their warehouse, John and I waited and waited and waited. We waited until after 7 p.m. for our delivery, it was a very long day of waiting. Finally, towards evening the sales associate calls to inform us that they had not been able to locate the adjustable base we had ordered so instead they were sending us the deluxe version, one that cost hundreds of dollars more, at no extra charge.

Now here I'd like to enlighten you with the difference between the standard and the deluxe. A standard base is one that can raise the head and/or the foot area of the bed to suit ones comfort. The deluxe version not only does this but also has various "message" settings from constant "message" motion to waves of "message" and many different speeds to these "massage" motions. As you've probably noticed I've placed the word massage into quotation marks as I feel that perhaps message isn't quite the word for it. Even though the mattress store calls it "massage" it is nothing like the popular Shiatsu massage chairs and machines. A more adequate description would be "vibrator". If one likes to be "vibrated" this would be right up their alley. As I mentioned we chose the no frills adjustable bed frame and it wasn't solely because of price constraints; I had tried the floor model massage bed, laid on it for awhile and was not impressed. Nor did I appreciate the obvious noise that the unit emitted. By-the-way you've no idea what it's like to reach over in the dark of night, drowsy and not altogether with it, reach for the mattress control to lower your head a bit and hit the darn massage button. HUMMMM, BRRRUMMMM, HUMMM, BRRRUMMM. Heart attack city !!!

Hang in there friends, unfortunately this story isn't quite over. Our new mattress had a 30 day exchange program and after a couple of weeks of breaking it in, I noticed that, upon awakening, my hip would be stiff and sore. John said he had the same problem. So off to see the wizard, the wonderful mattress wizard of Ahs. The Wiz diagnosed our problem, our mattress was too firm. So now we had two choices; either we could exchange our new mattress for a softer mattress that was the same price but it would not be a brand name mattress, it would be the store brand, a no name brand or.....drum roll....we could upgrade to a super duper Tempur Pedic foam mattress...for more of course...much more. John and I were dubious about having a no name mattress, the fear of the unknown. Whereas Tempur Pedic is a well known brand, the elite of the elite and the epitome of foam mattresses...all foam mattress aspire to be a Tempur Pedic ! So ka-ching, ka-ching and you can add in a few more ka-chings.

We may end up with the bank repossessing our home and living under a bridge in a cardboard box but dang it we'll be sleeping really well.