Saturday, July 9, 2011

Where Have The Lilies Gone ???

I have returned and you will find that lilies have nothing what-so-ever to do with this post other than they are pretty and cheerful and at the moment there are none to be found in my flowerbeds or my life. 
Were I to say that my blog absence was due to some exotic trip or bold new adventure would be, well it would be an outright lie!  What I've truly been doing for the past several weeks is wallowing in a pit of depression.   Depression self-inflicted in part by self-pity, of bemoaning my lackluster etsy shop and beating myself up over things that I've little or no control over. 

My daughter called me a few weeks ago.  She was in tears and bawling as though her heart would break.  Reason ?  She just found out her oldest son's girlfriend is pregnant.  Bad news? Yes.  Heartbreaking news? Yes. End of the World news?   Not quite. 

My oldest grandson is 21, his girlfriend is slightly younger.  Both have minimal educations and minimal paying jobs.  Yes the pregnancy was an accident, unplanned.  She was taking birth control pills and then was put on antibiotics for a sinus infection.  Guess she didn't read the precautions that came with her meds.  When on a course of antibiotics and taking birth control pills, one should take extra precautions and use an alternative method of birth control.  A fact that obviously slipped under their radar.

It took my daughter a couple of days to get over the disappointment and of course she now understands just how I felt when I found out she, my then 19 year old daughter, was going to be a Mommy.  She was too young to be a mother ... I wanted her to go to college, get a degree ... she had such promise, such potential.  Hell I was too young to be a grandmother !!!!  And now it's come around full circle.  Such is life.  Funny life !  Uncontrollable life ! 

Now what am I going to do ?   What's my daughter,who insists she's going to be a nana and not a granny, going to do ? Well first of all, if she's going to be a nana then I'm going to be a grana.  Next  we'll go shopping for baby items  together and then we'll sit down and start planning a baby shower for our future grandchild and great-grandchild.

We all sit at life's poker table and try to make the most with the cards we're dealt. Sometimes the cards contain a few queens or kings, other times we're lucky to just get a pair of deuces.
Life's too short to fret over things beyond one's power and I've heard it said that if you concentrate on the big things the important matters in life, then all the small things, all that not so important stuff takes care of itself.  True perhaps, but even truer is the fact that no amount of worry is going to make things better.   And so THAT'S MY 2 CENTS FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH.


  1. Hey Anna, I hope congrats are in order :)

    I think having babies around, do in a small way take the stress out of life, they are a little symbol of hope (oh, and a lot of work so you forget about the small stuff, no time to think about that (bad time for humour??? :)

    Sorry, you have been down, life really is way more challenging right now than the silly government is letting on and I think we are all being hit with a universal economic depression and that is causing emotional confusion and depression.

    And when I read that Maria Shiver is going out and spending $10 million on a house I just want to scream!!!!! (not good words either He! He!)

    Hope you have a good weekend and I love that you are being so positive about the news of Baby.

    Maybe they can use one of the names we came up with for Baby Becks!!!

    Take Care, regards, T. :)

  2. Thanks T - It's posts like this one that lets us know who our true followers are. :) People don't care to hear the downers and I doubt that most of them ever made it past my first paragraph before clicking onto something more upbeat and syrupy perky. I'm happy to see that at least one person read to the end and realized it wasn't all about self-pity. :)

    In the end perhaps my 2 cents isn't worth ... well isn't even worth 2 cents in the blogosphere. LOL But life isn't always a bed of roses and a bunch of chuckles. So dearest T I hope you'll stick around as I have my fingers crossed that I'll be posting photos of that new great-grandchild when he or she makes their debut into this world. ;)

  3. That is rough and I would cry too. Best wishes all around and you are right that it is not the end of the world--someday you are not going to be able to imagine a world without that baby!

  4. I think it's wonderful it's own way. I was a young mommy the first time around, not quite planned but somehow life has a way of showing up unannounced sometimes. I'm sure it will bring challenges as I know mine did, but in the end it was all worth it. My son now 22 has grown into a fine young man, polite and respectful, holds a job and I'm proud for the most part of the choices he makes nowadays. Though maybe we have other plans for our own lives or our children's I truly believe that some things are just meant to be.

    It sounds like you've got nice plans to be there and help your daughter out at a time when she needs some extra support. That's what Mommies are for after all.

    I'm so sorry that you've been down, but I hope that maybe the excitement of this new situation will get you busy and planning and bring you back in to the sunshine.

    Sending you and your loved ones all the best.


  5. What's that saying, 'while we're busy making plans, life happens'. It happens to all of us in one way or another and we have to deal with the initial shock and absorb what happened. Sometimes it's easier than other times. And while this might not be the ideal circumstances to have a baby, who can resist the joy that one brings? I hope you and your daughter have fun shopping and planning for this next chapter in your lives. And I can't wait to see photos...lots of them! :)

  6. Janet - Meeling - Annette -
    Thank you each for your kind comments. Yes I'm sure it will turn into a joyous occasion soon enough. Babies are such precious little things it would be impossible not to look upon one as a divine blessing. :)

  7. I think your 2 cents are worth way more than 2 cents if that's any consolation my friend. I will say congrats for sure because regardless of the situation surrounding the dilemma (not sure that's the right word choice, hope you get my point!) there will still be a beautiful little baby to love and care for. She will do just fine as a new mom, with your daughter as nana and you as grana that baby is sure to be spoiled with tons of love!

  8. My family went through something very similar with my brother and his now ex wife. Their daughter Lillian (my niece) is the light of everyone's life. She is now 4 going on 20! She is a trip and we couldn't have asked for a better gift to this family. Times are tough for them and they both made their choices and have to live with them. It is nice to see a family come together after an event like this taking place. I am sure your family will work it out just perfectly and enjoy every second... even the rough ones! : )

  9. Oh my friend you are a great MOM and will be an awesome Grana! I love how you look at things and accepts what life has to throw at you with such grace and dignity. Hugs to all of you!

  10. My dear! A Mistake is something awful...this child is a surprise! My surprise is going to be 18 years old this November. She is the light of my life! Mistake? No! Unexpected? Yes! Wonderful? Without a doubt. Sometimes we get a gift we didn't expect and it is exactly what we needed! Rejoice in the moment!


Nothing makes me happier than to hear from those who have dropped by my blog for a visit. I love hearing from you.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...